20 Years

20 years of existence

20 years of sisterhood

20 years of women beginning a process

20 years of women excelling in life

20 years of friendships that have grown into more than just

chapter meetings & programs

20 years of stories & support

To think that 20 years ago 13 women dared to DREAM BIG

and 20 years later their dream continues to build with each new member.

I'm sure my founding mothers did not think this far ahead,

but then again who would have.

I'm proud to be a SIA and to have earned my letters.

Even though I'm not involved as much as I was four years ago,

I am still very aware of the fact that I joined

The Best Hermandad

So to my sisters I say: S.U.E.I.

Since September 1990

Sometimes...

Sometimes I let slumps get to me. Things can't always have a high... what goes up must come down. I like to remember and be conscious of moments like this so that when I do succeed I can appreciate the things i have even more.

Today the sunshine reminded me that I have to be proactive about my happiness. After all I'm only 24, and I believe I just began to live.

<3>

turns

so many ups and downs and crossings and forks on the road.

wtf am I going to do with my life?

Hmmm. No final answer.

Unconventionally Sweet

I'm always trying to figure out how I could reinvent myself. A classic version of myself with a twist. A twist of lime with sugar on the side... hmm.

What do I want to be? Where do I want to be? Who do I want to be?

I honestly don't know yet. As I'm starting to build this thing to define it would be difficult and quite impossible.

Sometimes we get so caught up in trying to figure ourselves out that we forget to just live. In the now.

So last night, after some comfort food and prior to an inspiring conversation with an amazing man

I decided to ink a reminder on myself. An ideal of mine and a motto I don't want to ever forget.

I don't want to ever limit myself.

Or to live by other peoples rules (and I mean social rules) or standards.

What my closets friends might find risque or wild or ridiculously unconventional, I may see as normal.

I want to expose myself like undeveloped film, and see where life takes me.

Who knows, I might end up in the suburbs making cookies for my kids soccer team (yum!)

OR

I might end up traveling the world, and living off my backpack for the next 10 years.

Whatever it is I end up doing, where ever this thing takes me... I want to always remember to

DREAM BIG

The heart at the end symbolizes something bigger than just a cute symbol.

But lets just say they follow me, and are truly an omen whenever I'm doubting my place in this universe.

To the person who held my hand, and shared part of their journey with me. Thank you. There are two types of people in this world, the one's who overcome adversity and the one's who give up because of a cloudy day. Sometimes we are at the right place, at the right time. Sometimes it is what it is.

MisUnderstood

Dedicated to: Unconventionally Sweet

words

I love it when you're dating someone and they say all the right things, do all the right things, make you feel all the right things... got you calling friends to brag about the kiss, got you running around looking for the perfect outfit, got you wondering what is next... got you... got you... rewind.

Lets go back to the "say all the right things" part. I know we have no control over the future, or the way things end or the relationships that turn into friendships... but we do have control over our words. Why would you say things and then go back on your words. I like staying friends with those who were special to me at some point in time... and I'm learning that this can't always be the case. I just wish men would be more receptive and conscious of their words... words...that got you... got you... got you...

rewind.

Whether you like it or not, you are now part of my history...I'm my own narrator.

MisUnderstood. Recalling my past, so that I don't trip over the same stone twice in my present...

Pregnant...

The anticipation of my future is making me so anxious you'd think I'm going to give birth... I guess that's the irony since I'm pregnant with thought... but isn't that always the damn case? Hmmm.

So what is next? I'm border line contemplating buying a one way ticket to some place and just taking it from there, but then I think of the fact that this only works out for young pretty girls in movies. And although sometimes I swear I'm in a show (a la 'The Truman Show') I know it wouldn't be as easy nor as fun as that girl had it from Coyote Ugly...

Is not that I'm not willing to take the necessary risks, I'd love to move somewhere for a year and live an experience (like my girl Jmo) but I'm just trying to be logical. I picked up this logical thing at the beginning of this year when I realized I was quick to make executive decisions and then they would wait for me in that dark alley and kick my ass. And there is no sense in being jumped... ya'na'mean!?

I guess I just get really impatient with myself and where I think I should be at this moment in my life. I know I'm blessed and can't complain---so I am not.

I'm just experiencing some major contractions... so bare with me as I give birth to this thing called life.

((smile, its contagious))

MisUnderstood

My senses don't lie...

I'm in a transitional stage of life... I feel as if I'm running in place and someone is holding me by the back of my shirt, teasing me. I'm just waiting for fate to let me go so I can move forward with destiny.

The things I want are so close I can smell them. At the end of last year Love was on my mind 24/7, now its my career and my dreams of that apt. I can see my king size bed with white sheets and a million pillows waiting for me at night, I can see my wall of inspiration painted by one of my friends ready for my viewing pleasure every day I awake. I can smell the sweet scent of my sazon on the frying pan as I cook for my dinner party... I envision 10 candles lit around me as I take a bubble bath, drink a glass of red wine and listen to the soothing voice of Maxwell.

I hear my my phone ring at my desk and the sound of my voice answering, I see my De La Vega mug that reads "BECOME YOUR DREAM" steaming with my morning green tea. I can feel the keys of my mac underneath my finger tips as I come up with something creative... and if my creativity is lacking I can look up and see the photographs of my parents and friends smiling at me encouraging me to keep going...

If wants and needs self manifest, then let the visions of my very near future come true. Stability, liberty and the continuation of my #1 goal in life: HAPPINESS.

To that higher being, all I ask if for guidance.

Like a Phoenix I risse...