Rewind...

I def just read all the 20 blogs I have posted since January, and dios mio... Que bueno que los lei. Porque ahora me siento como que tengo que coger el boton de rewind y tu sabes, PUSH IT. Para poder recordarme de toda las locuras que me pasaron el ano anterior... Ultimamente I've been on this rut, on this depressing thing on and off and on and off, inner battles... como un juego de mortal combat, me entiendes? Y este, I just dont like it. Haci poof! no me gusta estar deprimida. Y entonces, el primer blog that I wrote I spoke about how only I can make me happy. Not anything or anyone else... y la verdad es that I needed that self smack in the face... so I can start being thankful, and happy... bc aunque no tenga chavos, y este soltera (mami dice ponte las pilas, o te me quedas jamona... I say fuk it, good thing I have books to read that will last me until the next lifetime) and I am not muy feliz con mi peso (that i blame on being a female) and ummm tengo pique con este maldito economic issue that we are faced with, and me molesta que even though ill have a Bachelors that doesn't gurantee me a career of MY CHOICE where I will be happy when I wake up... no espera, a career that will help ME help the ONE and only person en este mundo que mira, no matter what i do... I'm still perfect in her eyes... and even if I only have ONE PILLOW ( its this joke ppl seem to have since I only own a single lonely skinny uncomfortable pillow)... I am still going to levanterme manana, open up these ugly brown curtains that my school provided for me (oh thank you, 34 gs of tuition) and say... Dios, Grande... si eres mujer, or a man... Thank you. Because I am alive, and as long as I am breathing... I can motivate myself... and trust me, even if i have to drag myself through my pearly white teeth... I will make something of myself... Por mi madre, que si.

Reflecting is a beautiful thing.