Thursday, February 25, 2010

Dominicana/Española & Afro-Latina


Afro-Latino. A term that seems to be sprouting up like the rose that grew from the concrete now more than ever.

I went to an event last night held by Columbia University that was all about being Afro-Latino in the Americas and how this affects us as adults and how it affects our children. Although the forum was focused more on how to teach this term and how to discuss this part history to students in a classroom setting, it did spark many questions and discussions when the floor was opened to the attendees.

One girl, from the teachers program @ Columbia, expressed that she couldn’t wrap her mind around the notion that Latinos can be racist. I nearly fell off my chair. It is sad, but it is true. Latinos can be racist within themselves and even within their own families. And I am sure as it was mentioned in last nights forum, that it all dates back to the ideals of what “pretty” or what “the best” was during times of colonialism.

What is more sad is that what our parents learned (if they were born in the “native land”) was taught to us in one way or the other and most of our generation continues to live in a box that doesn’t want to neither accept our African roots nor identify with it on a basic level. I understand that Afro-Latino is a loaded term that can cause an ocean of emotions to turn into a tsunami.

But it does not change the fact that we need to discuss this. I was aware of this term but have never really looked into it, until now. I think now I am ready to sit my mother down and attempt to have this conversation. Lets talk about why it is that people in Dominican Republic say “Tienes que ayudar a la raza” (you have to help better the race). Even if said in the context of a joke, I don’t find that funny. Or why is it that if you are dating someone who is black or Afro-Latino but has Anglo features, they say “ES UN(A) MORENO(A) FINO(A)” (He’s black but he has fine features). What bothers me more is that these are comments coming from people with caramel skin, button noses and wide lips.

What is the issue? Makes me upset. But at last, ignorance is a choice at this age. And I choose to learn rather than to live in this box filled with stereotypes, assumptions, and inherited hatred from the slave trade. I want to look into linguistics, hypo-descent, colonialism etc etc. I know my children will be quite colorful on the outside and I want them to be fully aware of their backgrounds.

Someone in the room said : HOW COULD YOU BE PROUD OF WHO YOU ARE, IF YOU’RE ASHAMED OF WHERE YOU’RE FROM.

I say the same.

The second part of the forum brought to us a performance by a group of people who had not played together in the past and they were so AMAZING. They played and explained instruments like the congas, el subidor, el buleador etc. they discussed bomba plena in Cuba vs. Puerto Rico.

At one point this woman got up and started to dance and with the shake of her hips and tick of her shoulders she told the drum what to play. It was simply AWESOMETASTIC. After their mini history lessons on the Orishas (a whole other subject I want to explore) and their wonderful songs; I felt as if my soul had been cleansed. It’s the only way to explain it. I kept imagining myself on an island at night dressed in white, hair wild and loose with fireflies lighting the way.

I love culture. Cultura. History. Herstory. OURstory.

Learning.

FanStar.

Monday, February 22, 2010

Beggers cant be choosers


So finding a job these days is like finding El Dorado (city of gold). At first I was sad and jumping on the downward spiral express train to no where, but now I find it rather humorous. Since my current ventures are up in the air and I am not sure where I'll be next, I've decided to cover all possible bases and apply to as many jobs as possible.

And so today I made a list of over 30 coffee shops in the tri-state area with addresses and phone numbers and once done called them up. Most of the individuals on the receiving line were either rude or did not speak english well AT ALL. Don't think I have anything against people with accents, after all many have told me I myself have one, but if you can't answer a phone properly then perhaps you should not be picking i t up. Just saying. Regardless the voices and responses to my simple: Are you hiring?: were quite the picker upper.

Just to put it out there, most coffee shops are not hiring (haha) I suppose people are cutting down on caffeine and rather opt for water. Hmmm...



Rude:
Cafe Grumpy --- GO FIGURE

Nice:
McNulty's Tea & Coffee
La pregunta arts cafe
Cafecito
East Harlem cafe
Joe's

Interesting enough three out of the five above are Latino owned.... Get it Migente!

Back to the drawing board!

FanStar ::Just Lovely::

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Oh where the days will lead

I have this funny feeling circulating my body, a tingling sensation creeping up from the pit of my stomach to the edges of my gums.


My weekend in a nutshell:
Thai.Laughs.Catch up (not to be confused with ketchup). Piercing.Dance.Mom time.Mac. (sigh)

Notes to self:
-Continue to reconnect with friends who show they love you
-Be more spontaneous, even if it involves not being the leader
-Write down childhood stories told by mom
-Spend more time with self, because self will be the one to get you out of the darkest corners imaginable


::May the limitations of love not cast a spell on the serious ambitions of my mind:: --Jose Marti

FanStar

Friday, February 19, 2010

The world is conspiring in your favor



Did you ever run out of school to the bodega and buy a pack of pop rocks? No, I don’t mean drugs (Jeez), I mean the candy that pops in your mouth. Well, if you have you know that it’s the most exciting thing to touch your mouth (lets get the sexual innuendos out of our minds so that we can best enjoy this post please). A burst of pure uncontrollable energy.

That is what just happened to me. YES, THAT JUST HAPPENED.

I sat for a cup of coffee with the Executive Director of the International Latino Film Festival, and if I told you I didn’t think I could conquer the world after talking to her I would be lying through my keyboard. She was simply awesometastic. I was able to pick her brain and talk about the festival and the film industry, about life and all the randomness that comes a long with it and as she spoke to me I just kept thinking this lady is the clerk with the answers my mind was looking for (read previous blog). I feel as if the Macy’s 4th of July fireworks event was being held inside my body at this precise moment.

All roads point to somewhere, whether you know it right now or realize it years from now.

“The World Is Conspiring in Your Favor”---DLV

Someone asked me this week: So what’s next for you? And I had no answer. Now I do: To Live.


<3

Light & Sweet


Territorial call me black wolf of the night

Better yet call me Cleo-Patra

Queen of pharaohs

Narrow

Alleys I walk through.


Rivers I carry underneath my nonchalant eyes.

If I were reincarnated I'd be not a wolf but a bird

that pirouettes through the skies.

Full of energy like the strings on his guitar

I bet if this love is real we can go far.


Nah baby, I'm from Venus AND from Mars

A complex potion of sorts

contortions of emotions

that I can't quite understand myself.


Like art that's never quite finished

with black, white, green, purple and sometimes reddish...

thoughts that provoke a stampede of urges.


Like a domino effect your smell I detect...

Quizzical looks we share in between sheets,

Intertwined bodies from the tip of your tongue to the end of your feet.


Light and Sweet addicted I am to you like you are to morning caffeine.

Believe it or not a definite feen.

A feen for your voice

A feen for your laugh

A feen for the way that you make me want to dance.

Take off my shoes, loosen these screws

Turn up that song...because its never too long

before I go back to needing my fix of that... Light and Sweet.

Addicted I am to you, like you are to morning caffeine.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Brilliance is Brewing (AsJmoSaid)


I sure wish there was a clerk stationed somewhere in my brain who organized my thoughts and answered the difficult questions I don't want to answer when answers are needed. Woke up wondering if I should make the next moves that impact my life based on the expectations those close to me have of me, or the expectations I have for myself.
Thing is, I am right back at square one (right after college finished), except I would call it square 2 since I am a little bit wiser a little less jaded but still a novice with an abundance of knowledge.
How does that make sense you ask? I don't know, the clerk won't tell me....grrr...

However, brilliance was brewing last night and I just want to give a huge shout out to JMo, my official partner in what I'll call: a new road to self discovery. Love you dearly, and we will be inspirations to others... I believe it!

On to my adventure:
We went to the VV Brown concert held by Giant Step at the Hiro Hotel. Despite having to wait two hours while Ms. Brown got her feathers on right, I managed to like the Puerto Rican/Jamaican but British born artist's music. She was great at entertaining and I'm looking forward to what else she has in store for the diverse mass consumer. However, it wouldn't be a night if there wasn't some plain blue button down shirt wearing college frat boy screaming in my ear "FUK YEA". He wasn't as charming as his obnoxious friend who was persistent in getting in front of me even though everyone (including the hipsters) kept grilling him. Jeez, where are the manners I thought?! and then I remembered we are in NYC. And in NYC anything flies. Even my fist. Well, in my imagination at least. haha.
VV was enticing! However, why is it that you can say anything with a British accent and still sound amazing? She cursed like it was part of her act and still we were all giddy like a pup with a new chew toy. The best part of her performance by far, aside from when she sang her single, was her singing and rapping Drake's "Best I ever Had". I was HYPED. Get it!

Ah, the other side of the pond is quite refreshing isn't it? Let us hope Mr. Daniel Merriweather blesses us with his acoustic performance soon.

Fan Star ::Plotting away::

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Are you a Mac or a PC...


I've had a Sony for 5 years. I loved him. It was there for me when I needed music to refresh my soul, when I needed info to add to the random facts folder filed in my memory cabinet and when I had massive amounts of ideas to write down before they vanished like David Blaine. He was the longest relationship I've had and then he, like any other he, failed me (Just Kidding Humor for the Masses).

So I said; now that I am starting many personal projects I need a new laptop. Little did I know that there are too many brands, processors and GB for me to understand so quickly. I thought, simple minded as I can sometimes be, that I could waltz my way into a Best Buy and my new laptop would choose me. Not quite.

The waltz turned into a complicated 3 hour break dancing session, and after 2 hours of walking in circles with Harvey (that's the name of my Best Buy customer service rep, who actually worked in the camera department and just happened to be laptop savvy--thank you Harvey!), asking my girls on bbm chat and harassing my bf through messenger and through phone calls I chose a Dell. I went from a Toshiba, to a Sony, to a gorgeous scarlet red Dell. I quietly thought to myself "it's okay that I'm starving, my feet are permanently in pain and I almost had an anxiety attack, because now I get to go home and sleep next to my new love"--okay maybe not sleep next to it, but definitely close to it.

But we know the universe likes to joke around when it needs a pick me up, and so the story didn't simply end with the above joyful pre-thought. The bank would only let me take a certain amount of money since the quantity I needed must have looked sketchy to the atm machine. After a couple of Spanglish curses and "WHY GOD" I crossed the street and told the man holding my Dell hostage that I would have to return with bail money tomorrow.

Now I've spent the last 2 hours online reading up on the MacBook and asking fellow Mac-users an abundance of questions about iWork and iMovie etc etc. And well, it seems I will be transferring myself from a private college (x laptop) to an ivy league (mac-licious).

Just Sharing. <3>

I Like My Plate Colorful...


Expectations lead to disappointments. That's something I(we) always say, and yet it is almost ridiculous to expect not to have expectations (make sense? or is that an oxymoron...). Anywho, every year this holiday comes around, and I know it was designed to pry on women's emotions because after all --men could care less about chocolates and roses.

So, every year this holiday comes around (who knows the history behind vday btw????) and I just squirm at the thought of it. Why? Because it carries so much weight. Its almost as bad as figuring out how to propose the right way to your counterpart... and why? for WHAT? I won't get into the politics behind it because I like to think my people are well aware of it, however isn't all just a little too .... played out.

But , the above is written by a broken hearted girl who has gone through many depressing and humorous vday moments. However, this year Aphrodite's took mercy upon my heart and I happened to thoroughly enjoy this holiday (happy dance).

I suppose it was for three reasons:
1. I spent it with a man whose magic keeps me with a permanent plastered smile (no poker face here)

2. He made it thoughtful, a quality I thought men did not possess

3. It was unconventional in the way that no extravagant gifts were exchanged nor was the dreaded Hallmark card with lots of hearts and glitter that seem to overshadow the message written by the messenger given.

(sigh)
Simple.Sweet.Memorable.

After a delicious meal (Cuban food Rocks) we went to see Platanos & Collard Greens. If you have not seen it I suggest you go. It deals with subjects of race, love, friendship and family. Subjects I know too well. Reminded me of how painfully aware I am that a lot of Dominicans can be really ignorant about race and still have the Trujillo mentality complex. It reminded me of when I was a freshman in college and a lot of the Black females looked at me lop sided because one of the lighter "brothas" was after me and not them (I suppose their thought process was: add insult to injury since there were not that many "brothas" to begin with). It reminded me of the ish my own family and friends families have said about interracial relationships.

I always question if I have the right to get offended at some of the things people say if it does not apply to my sex/gender/race/heritage, but why not? Above all else I am human and if I don't like the bs coming out of your mouth I'll be challenging you on it.

I love all things culture (except for opera or musicals, haha I can't do those). And I love seeing interracial couples. Which is why (praise Jesus don't fail me now) I hope I marry (happy marriage, that's a whole other blog) someone who is not Dominican (Abel you're the exception to the rule haha). I think the future lies in a fusion of say me (Dominican/Spaniard) and him (whatever he may be).

So my advice to the singles out there is: date someone who falls outside your usual pattern. Listen to the elders advice but above all else listen to your own. Black,Asian,Caribbean,European,South American and mixed and match are all wonderful. Beauty is in the eye of of the beholder.

FanStar ::Falling Faster Than A Bungee Jumper::

Friday, February 12, 2010

Make it Happen...

I had my first interview w/ new comers to the reggeaton scene Dyland & Lenny yesterday and I was sweating buckets. I usually don't get nervous-- except when I'm holding the experience to be life changing/memorable (I'm gonna guess my wedding date I'll need deodorant near by).

I was able to use a private room during my lunch break which was great since I needed the speaker to be semi-loud on the phone. Everything was set up to go, and then the computer decides to shut down (PC's are officially the root of all evil). Fret not, I didn't panic. I simply laughed for about a minute, after all life is funny that way.

When the phone rang I quickly took out pen and paper and did it the old school way. By the end of the interview I had a couple of pages filled with great quotes and information on these two gentleman that could last me for days. Oh, did I mention I had to do the interview in Spanish? Good thing I was raised in Venezuela huh? haha (pow dow).


The experience was exhilarating, the guys were able to help me forget about my perspiring issue and that my hand had to move as quick as my mind. I must say, charming to the last second. They both kept it so humble, and made me laugh the whole time. I will be rooting for them and congratulate them on being signed to Sony.

I love hearing stories of people who find themselves to be ordinary and soon come to see they are extraordinary beings in the eyes of millions. Inspiring? I'd say so.

Check out their single out now... Right on time for Vday. <3

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Frika...Frika...


I am creatively expanding and it feels so good. Imagine running for miles and finally drinking a bottle of water. Refreshing no doubt. I am not sure where it will lead, if anywhere at all but to be frank I'm not getting any younger and the worse thing that could happen is rejection. Now, I have already learned to deal with rejection in my personal life (both romantic/family related/ and with friendships), so it is only natural I become un-phased by rejection in my career/projects. And if rejection is to be some what of a key player in this much needed plunge, it could only be taken with a grain of salt. After all, the best lessons and ideas come when a few others have failed. I am sure Thomas Edison didn't get all his inventions quite right the first time around...

Taking a chance on myself also means that others are also taking a chance on me, and for that I am thankful. It may be that I won't have that certain je ne sais quoi that these individuals are looking for in a "chance vessel", but I'll say this much: I'll work to try and surpass not others expectations but rather the expectations I have for myself.


On another note, I am very happy the underdogs aka the Saints won the Superbowl. I missed the whole thing do to an uncontrollable slumber fest, so I am not going to comment on any great passes or tackles but I hope Kimmi cakes showed Reggie Chocolate Bush a victory dance (I would have done the Harlem shake for him--my specialty).

I just saw 3 short clips of Lonnie "You Make My Heart Melt" Lynn aka Common on Current TV (gracias Ran el Man for the "put on") and if I didn't love this man before, I most definitely do now. He is what I call a real artist. From what it seems, he has not forgotten where he came from and continues to embrace his people. His fans. This man seems so humble, never being boastful about how much he has done for our Hip-Hop Generation....I can't wait for his new album which according to the blogs is dropping this year. Let us hope I get to see him in concert soon.

On that Hip-Hop note, I am reading "Its Bigger than Hip-Hop" by M.K. Asante Jr. and I am loving his writing style so far. I feel as if I'm witnessing one of the greatest ongoing speeches, I suppose this is because he is a professor. Admirable, since the dude is in his 20's. He is also a film maker and has dreadlocks which I love. Haha. Let me live.

I want to continue in surrounding myself with creative types. Whether the passion lies in building small cities out of Lego's or building minds through words, that does not matter. I just wish to inspire and be inspired. Limitations are tricks we play on ourselves.

Like a Phoenix I rise. 2010.

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

You get no love...


This is going to sound like a random post, or maybe it wont (if you know me well enough you know I'm an addict to music)...


I've been listening to Lupe Fiasco all day and I just need to give him a huge shout out a long with all the other amazing MC's out there that get no love by mainstream media. I guess you have to have a bumping beat and lyrics that degrade on all levels (insert "make her say ahh") to get your songs played. I'm not going to sit here and say I don't jam away to a li'l wayne song if I happen to wander into a lounge, but I know and acknowledge that there is way more out there than just JayZ, 50 Cent and the other 5 that are on heavy rotation.


A lot of dudes trying to make it out there in the "game" but I'd say 90% lack the real talent and the other 10% lack the drive, or have the drive but no one shows them love. (hug it out).


It sucks that real talent sometimes goes over looked simply because the next looks more glittery. Take a look at BeyBey @ the Grammys. I loved her performance and was a fan of Sasha Fierce. BUT she is over saturated and if I see one more video with leotards and two back up dancers I'm going to have to give myself a time out. -_- 6 awards? a new record set? are you serious? Adele (amazing artist) was over looked, India Arie got like 3 minutes of air time on the tvguide network and the person interviewing her didn't even know she had just won an award. SMH.


Can other artist get some shine!? Mi gente, please. Explore and open your mind to the many possibilities that music, art, dance and theater provide... there is a huge world out there waiting for you to google it.


Lovely.


FanStar